“I’d like to bring a sex toy into my relationship but I’m not sure how to bring it up with my partner.”
Looking to introduce sex toys in the bedroom? Kate and Louise over at Team Sex Ed answer this question and offer some tips and tools to make the conversation more easeful.
Many women and men are curious about sex toys but feel reluctant to talk with their partner about it for fear of offending them. One misconception is that sex toys act as replacements or make up for a partner’s inadequacies. As Kate and Louise discuss in the video below, it’s important to be prepared for this reaction. Be sensitive and stroke his or her ego a bit. As with any relationship, good communication goes a long way in solving any problem.
To start the conversation with your partner, consider these strategies:
- Make sure you start the conversation in a relaxed and comfortable environment so it doesn’t feel rushed or pressuring.
- Reassure your partner that the toy is not making up for any inadequacies, but simply is a fun addition to sex.
- Go sex toy shopping together and pick one out that you both like. Kate and Louise offer recommendations for toy shops.
- Select a toy that is proportional to your level of experience. Smaller toys are a good place to start if you are new to using sex toys.
- Maintain a playful attitude and keep it fun. This will go a long way in nurturing your connection with your partner.
- Check out our articles on body safe sex toys and how to safely share a dildo.
This video was originally published on the Team Sex Ed channel.
BY KATE MCCOMBS & LOUISE BOURCHIER | Team Sex Ed! Kate & Louise
KATE MCCOMBS is a NYC-based sex educator, writer, and maker of puns. Ultimately, all of Kate’s work is about helping people feel more comfortable talking about sex. She believes that meaningful conversations + accurate information can help us create a healthier and more pleasure-filled world. Kate writes articles and teaches workshops about sexual health, pleasure, and communication.
Follow Kate on Twitter @katecom
LOUISE BOURCHIER, MPH is a sex educator who knows health and pleasure. She teaches workshops to adult audiences throughout Australia and New Zealand, where her mission is to facilitate access to information that allows people to experience healthy and pleasurable sex lives. She works closely with D.VICE: the toy shop for grownups and is a proud emissary of Sex Geekdom Melbourne. Follow her on Twitter @louiselabouche